Why Is My Pan On Fire?

Day 1.
17 Years and 30 Days Old
First apartment, very long drive from any relatives.
One package of rice-a-roni and the cheapest pan Wal-mart would sell me.

An odd smell fills the room and the smoke detectors go off. So far, all I've done is put water in a pan and turn on the heat.
The bottom of the new pan caught on fire. To this day I don't know how that happened.

Sound familiar?

The Audience:

• All the single ladies (and dudes)
• Newlyweds (starting a tradition of healthy eating)
• Anyone else that doesn't want to eat processed foods and takeout the rest of their life

The goal here:

• Put words to all the assumed knowledge in recipes. A pinch... a dash... until browned and cooked through... 
• Be able to follow an episode of Good Eats without external information. (much more on that later)
• Learn that vegetables aren't just steamed side dishes
• Assemble the basic tools for success
• Practice good technique from day one

Time to start at square one.